It’s a common-held belief.
“People can’t change.”
You hear it on the street. People text it on their phones about their acquaintances. It’s all over the Internet.
This idea makes you feel good. Good in an egotistical kind of way. It saves you from going deeper into thinking. About yourself, your goals, your desires.
It’s what I call “a short circuit to reason.”
“I don’t change,” your mind replies. “I have known myself since I can remember. Why should I waste time in introspection?”
But the results of such a bypass to reflection are terrible:
- We hurt each other & don’t even regret it.
- We miss many opportunities for growth.
- We remain ignorant of our present self.
So…
If you hardly resemble the kid you once were, you are not the same as yesterday.
You are shaped by life.
And your life is unique.
Thus, you are a one-off accumulation of experiences, learnings, failures, relationships, reactions, mistakes, and many other constantly changing factors.
We tend to connect all these things in an all-embracing narrative that is the self, a tale that our mind tells to ourselves that has a hidden protagonist (time).
Once upon a time in Huntington Beach, a young me was struggling to learn to surf. After a few lessons with a soft top, I decided it was time to buy my first surfboard.
I had some money saved, and I didn’t want to feel like a total kook carrying a log into the ocean when everybody else was on a shortboard (error 1).
So I went to Huntington Surf & Sport to buy a new board (error 2). The guy in the surf shop asked about my surfing level, and I told him I was intermediate (error 3).
He then started showing me fun boards that were way longer than I expected. I kept saying no to all the boards he was offering me. Then, I looked up and saw it:
A Town&Country shortboard (error 4) that was astonishingly beautiful (error 5).
“What about that one?”, I asked. ”
“Too small,” was all he had to say.
Then he showed me another board.
But I insisted. “I like the colors.”
“That shape is too rad,” he said, trying to convince me.
And he did convince me, but to buy it.
“I want it!”
He gave me the you-really-are-a-kook look but went for the ladder to get me that board. I wasn’t listening to his expert advice (error 6). I was young and self-absorbed.
I even covered the deck with expensive grips because it was the nineties, which was what all surfers were doing (error 7).
So, I made 7 errors when I bought my first surfboard.
But they all come down to one:
“Not knowing myself.”
I excuse my old self because I was only 16.
You should start asking who you are immediately!
It’s not so important how many mistakes I made along the ride.
The most important thing is how many of these errors I would repeat now.
I’d like to believe that none.
The best way to change your mindset from a rigid “all set” to the liquid “free flow” is to understand the power of self-learning.
If you embark on introspection, you’ll become the real alchemist who can transform lead into gold—mistakes into lessons. This is the only way to escape from Groundhog Day. It’s also how to answer to Nietzsche’s vitality challenge with a big YES.
Yes!
I want to eternally repeat what I have done in my life because I can learn from all that life has offered me so far. It’s the ultimate Anti Aging treatment—curiosity is one of the few skills that we are born with & that we lose in our adult age most of the times out of ego-hardening habits (Ignorance = Not knowing your soul).
You’ll know yourself much better. You’ll set goals that align with your values. You’ll live a much happier and more purposeful existence. You’ll be a person that takes care of others & that others want to take care of & be around.
That’s the magic of philosophy!
Those who believe people can’t change are the ones that suffer the most in changing times.
And we all know that Tides They’re a Changing. AI, new economy, VR, and the digital taking over reality.
“Go with the flow, bro”, we tell each other.
Especially among surfers.
Cool advice.
But mountains and buildings don’t follow it, and that’s why they collapse.
Sacred crows & hardcore old-schoolers are hard as a rock.
They have it increasingly difficult.
And you don’t want that.
If you are to flow, you must remain flexible, soft, and shapeable (read the Surfboard Blanks series vol. I & vol. II if you haven’t).
And remain vigilant not to become too confident.
Or you’ll keep hanging on the wall very unused surfboards…
* * * * *
Mahalo for reading!
Wishing you good rides,
I’m starting a new course on PHILOSOPHICAL SOUL THERAPY next SEPTEMBER 18th.
Only 12 seats ava¡lable.
If you’re interested, reply this email with “COURSE.”
Additional recommendations:
- “An Essay Concerning Human Understanding” by John Locke: In this monumental work, Locke explores the nature of human knowledge and understanding. He emphasizes that the mind is not a passive receptacle of knowledge but an active agent that processes and shapes information based on experience. This aligns with the idea of embracing change and new experiences to develop a better understanding of oneself and the world.
- “Meditations” by Marcus Aurelius – This classic work of Stoic philosophy emphasizes adaptability and the ability to change oneself in response to the ever-changing circumstances of life.
- “Barbarian Days: A Surfing Life” by William Finnegan – A memoir that beautifully weaves together the author’s experiences as a surfer with insights into the transformative power of surfing and the connection between human nature and the ocean.
- “Surf Is Where You Find It” by Gerry Lopez – Written by a legendary surfer and thought leader, this book contains essays that reflect on the deeper lessons learned from surfing and the art of being in harmony with nature.
